Introduction to Maya - Rendering in Arnold
This course will look at the fundamentals of rendering in Arnold. We'll go through the different light types available, cameras, shaders, Arnold's render settings and finally how to split an image into render passes (AOV's), before we then reassemble it i
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1
08-07-2008
, 02:41 AM
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physics joke
There is this farmer who is having problems with his chickens. All of the sudden, they are all getting very sick and he doesn't know what is wrong with them. After trying all conventional means, he calls a biologist, a chemist, and a physicist to see if they can figure out what is wrong. So the biologist looks at the chickens, examines them a bit, and says he has no clue what could be wrong with them. Then the chemist takes some tests and makes some measurements, but he can't come to any conclusions either. So the physicist tries. He stands there and looks at the chickens for a long time without touching them or anything. Then all of the sudden he starts scribbling away in a notebook. Finally, after several gruesome calculations, he exclaims, 'I've got it! But it only works for spherical chickens in a vacuum.'
I bet a lot of you dont get it
ill post the answer later
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08-07-2008
, 04:39 AM
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08-07-2008
, 04:53 AM
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1. The universe was not created from the primeval waters of chaos, or by some guy in the sky, but by a chicken from an alternate dimension that spawned our universe when it imploded.
2. The chicken went supernova. Depending on the mass of the chicken, you may end up with a neutron star or a black hole.
3. The physicist, inspired by the chickens, discovered the Tau Particle, which creates "anomalous" phenomena. I for one bow before our Combine overlords! :bow:
4. The chickens were influenced by alien spacecraft. Hence the vacuum.
5. There is a new demonic/science cult around. Sacrificing chickens to the four prime evils, Diablo, Baal, Mephesto and Einstein involves violent decompression in a vacuum chamber.
6. Our knowledge of science is flawed. Chickens are the primary constituents of all matter in the universe. Sub-way-chicken-rolls are what chickens are made from, an analogy to neutrons, photons and electrons.
7. That new particle accelerator/colliding thingy in Europe did this. I told them the world would end when they switched in on!
I feel that we are nowhere closer.
C. P. U. Its not a big processor... Its a series of pipes!
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4
08-07-2008
, 05:07 AM
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theoretical physics only works in a vacuum with geometrical objects
its funnier every time i hear it
:blush:
:lmao:
:lmao:
:lmao:
:lmao:
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08-07-2008
, 05:12 AM
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I have no idea what just happened... but lol anyways...
So the chickens were affected by dark matter right?
C. P. U. Its not a big processor... Its a series of pipes!
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08-07-2008
, 05:38 AM
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everything the physicist did was analytical results and didn't take into account any of the other forces and stuff that come from emperical results
i hope i confuzzled everyone else too :attn:
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08-07-2008
, 06:53 AM
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08-07-2008
, 08:14 AM
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08-07-2008
, 08:48 AM
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(did you get it before reading the answer?) (if you did bravo)
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08-07-2008
, 10:39 AM
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(and to think I failed chemistry :p)
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11
08-07-2008
, 10:41 AM
As Zbrushiac sounds stupid!
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That was pretty funny! (and yes I had to read the answer :headbang: )
I've got a proggy joke for ya:
How many OOP's (Object Oriented Programmers) does it take to change a light bulb?
.... Non, they simply call the changeBulb() method
www.stevenegan-cgi.com
"Your weapons are no match for ours! People of Mars, surrender!"
"Um, this isn't Mars. This is Earth."
"Earth? Earth-with-nuclear-weapons Earth?"
"Yes."
[long pause] "Friend!!"
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08-07-2008
, 11:44 AM
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08-07-2008
, 02:23 PM
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i actually get that one...
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08-07-2008
, 07:04 PM
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heres another physics joke
a man sets a net to catch a fish but snares a duck
a mantis hunts an insects but is itself set upon by a bird
machinations within machinations
changes happen beyond changes
so how can cleverness and wit be relied upon
whats it mean??
take it easy and life will be easy
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