I dont think that it's transparent enough at the moment. It's also difficult to tell cause it's on black at the moment. What will "sell" this pic is the reflections and refractions of the light inside it. Get a hold of a nice environment or make your own and then try it and see how it looks.
even so that's still a good render of the diamond. What did you use to render it? I would expect to see some subtle reflections of the diamond in the ring itself though. Make a proxy object of the ring and then you should be able to apply the reflections. Or you could model the ring and see how close you can get it to the real thing.
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